Does this colostomy bag make my ass look big?

Well it's Sunday morning, everyone is asleep and the house is quiet. I woke up at around 5:30 this morning and made camp on the livingroom couch. I haven't had a full nights sleep in what seems like forever! I am averaging about 4 hours at a time now. That's an improvement from when I first came home from the hospital. I was getting 2 hours at a time then and it was a bitch! It's hard to sleep through the entire night when your body doesn't allow you to.
I can't wait for Tuesday when I go back to work! I am anxious to see how it goes! I know I am going to watch my diet the day before so I am not digesting food while I am at work. It's a totally different feeling when your colostomy bag is filling up than when you just normally feel like you have to go #2. There are little cramps involved sometimes and a little gas too depending on your diet. I haven't done this yet, but I need to start a diet diary to keep track of what I am eating, how fast it moves through me and how certain foods make me feel. It's another thing on my to-do list for myself. I need to move it up higher on the list!
I am trying to remember some other experiences that I can relay to all of you.....I am still not peeing normally. The surgeon said the nerve endings around my ass and bladder were irritated during the surgery and regular function may take a minute to return. Well it's been a minute! I can't even think about sex right now! The ability to get an erection is there, but with peeing being a bitch and a half I can only imagine what having an orgasm would feel like! I am nervous about that! It may hurt! Before the surgery the radiation made it feel like my orgasms would start up, but then pull back on its own. There are alot of "extra" things you go through that the doctors don't tell you about with this kind of surgery. I hope that this blog is informative on some level about these "extras".
I am going to watch some football today, take my lap around the neighborhood and maybe even clean up my computer desk area. In two months alot of crap has accumulated on and around it and it looks like crap! I also have to look through a medical catalogue and order some supplies. You would be amazed at how many different colostomy bags there are! The world is full of different people so I guess different sized colostomy bags are needed. I think we can come up with a design that is more comfortable and easier to attach and remove. There are adhesives involved in putting a bag on and it can pinch your skin when you take them off. I have some ideas and I am going to look into them as I live with this change in routine.
That's about it for now folks! As always I hope everyone is doing well out there. Take time out of your day to smell the roses!